Loss of memory

Just a few days ago, our computer crashed. We are still in the throes of the impact of this. It is a very long story, but the punchline (so to speak) to say that it ends with a complete loss of memory on our system. I have to admit there were tears, and some sense of panic. As we tried to see what could be salvaged, I felt like we were walking through the aftermath of a fire. When did we last make a back up disc? What had been moved to the G drive? What had I transferred to my laptop or the website for classes? What had I emailed to others that they might be able to return to me?

Most of all I keep asking, “what was there” and “what was no longer there?” What are we missing? Today we are faced with the tedious task of methodically going through the files that were recovered to see what we can find.

For the last few days and nights we have chugged through memory. I came to realize how often this has been coming up for me lately, besides the loss of potentially all our computer memory. A friend’s mom suffers from memory loss and really struggles. Our Brownies recently visited Alzheimer patients at the Jewish home. My son and I are reading a book called The Mysterious Benedict Society where the villain appears to be erasing pieces of memory from people. My kids and I were talking about the pensieve in Harry Potter and how they enter into old memories. I have been super busy and making lots of lists to help remember. We’ve been going through photo albums and telling stories. We’ve been connecting with friends on Facebook and telling even more stories. John and I talked for a long time last night about memories from between college and when we married. On a recent trip, we started a game called “Tell me a Memory” where we all get to tell something we remember about a certain time. At our last book club meeting, I was thinking of when we had read The Memory Keeper’s Daughter and The Time Traveler’s Wife.

As you can tell, I’ve been touched lately by what a fragile gift memory really is.

All of this called me to another memory. I kept recalling how important memory is in the life of the church. I kept having the thought, “Remember O Israel” come to mind. I did some research, and the word “remember” is listed over 200 times in Scripture. By far the majority of these are found in the Hebrew Bible, with a heavy percentage of those found in the Torah. Remember the covenant. Remember specific people by name. Remember dreams. Remember your personal story. Remember those who came before you. Remember the commandments. Remember God.

Remember, remember, remember… and don’t forget. Work as hard as you can not to forget. Memory loss is tragic in these pages.

The real beauty to all the memories, however, comes to this. We will forget. We will most certainly forget. Help comes in the form of those who come forth, bearing their stories, bearing our stories, who help us remember.

We fight the loss of memory by preserving it as best we can. Even in my computer loss, I know that because I have shared documents with others, they can help restore my files. My old friends, my family, my faith community – we all have shared memories. I can gather on Facebook, pull out those photo albums, get together with others that share and help preserve my memory. Those who suffer from Alzheimers and memory loss depend so much on others to remind them. We all, in fact, need reminding. What a gift others make as we remember – together.

John quoted yesterday a memory of a speaker who made an impact on him:
“People don’t need instruction, they just need reminding.”
Pat Lencioni

In other words, we already know. We know. We know down deep who we are, where we belong, where we came from, who loves us. Sometimes we just need reminding. We draw on the community of love that surrounds us to extract the precious memories we hold.

It turns out, the end of the story of my computer was not complete memory loss after all. We realized that if we were patient enough and thoughtful enough, we may discover a buried treasure of memory we had thought was long gone.

So, if memory seems to be fading, you can help. While we know that sometimes a complete recovery of the system may not be possible, we can certainly dig for pieces of the whole. Tell your stories. Ask for stories. Read stories. Save stories. Preserve those files. Seek those out who can help the story become even more full, rich, connected. When we all offer our pieces, the puzzle becomes more complete.

Don’t you remember? Of course we do. Amen and amen.

The Shema – Deut. 6:4-8
4 Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one. [a] 5 Love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. 6 These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. 7 Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8 Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 9 Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

Psalm 143
5I remember the days of old,
I think about all your deeds,
I meditate on the works of your hands.
6I stretch out my hands to you;
my soul thirsts for you like a parched land.
Selah

In Wisdom,
Brandi Calhoun Diamond